I saw a post the other day, by Sarah Wilson, who wrote the whole Quitting Sugar thing but more interestingly (I think) wrote an incredible and life-changing book on anxiety, called “First, we make the beast beautiful.” Which is also one of the greatest book titles in history.
She wrote something quite poignant, quite meaningful, and so I was surprised when I glanced down at the comments to read things like
“Looking beautiful, babe!”
I had to look back at the post, and yes, it was a nice picture of Sarah’s face. But she wasn’t posting about how nice she looked, or asking people if she was looking beautiful. She had something good to say.
And the comments (mostly from women) weren’t just from hordes of admirers, they were from people who seemed to know her. The Holy Moly post was from singer Clare Bowditch, who I thought was quite earthy and connected.
Another guy who talks about femininity and seems to be setting a reasonably good example for other men, posted something fairly insightful on the subject, also had thousands of comments along the lines “Wow, you look hot”.
Granted he had posted a shot of himself shirtless in a waterfall, but still…
What’s with this? I get it - pretty things are nice to look at. But doesn’t everyone find it a bit insulting, if they have something important to say, and people just comment about the way they look? Surely that’s kind of disheartening.
What say we stop with the “beautiful”.
In our comments. If we stop commenting on looks, maybe people won’t feel like they need to look a particular way, that maybe their words, and what they stand for, will be more important to the world.
Imagine what could happen then?